It's supposed to be something exciting
something new
and different
a refreshment of opportunities
but if that's true
then why am I sad
why can I not understand
what's going on
beneath my words
why do I try to figure it all out
and cause problems
where they don't exist
why am I the way I am?
why can't I just enjoy
what people tell me to
it should be
a happy moment
in time
but I can't focus on that
I can focus on anything but --
it's the furthest thing
from my mind --
the term "happiness"
because my face has forgotten
how to smile.
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